Sunday, November 30, 2003
Feeling Maine looking Massachusetts...
Home again, home again jiggedy jig. Your mother's a warthog. Your father's a pig.
Well we made finally made it home after a very very very long drive. Thankfully the weather was clear and we were driving against traffic! Who would have guessed it? We had a very productive day with a side trip Wal-Mart 1 hour into the drive. We bought our first Christmas lights, tree topper and skirt. We're totally going retro hokey. Which in reality is how we feel Christmas decorations should be. I can sum up shopping in Wal-Mart in five words fat people in jogging pants. If one more of them would have bumped into me I might have gotten violent. Plus there as a four-foot tall singing snowman which totally sent Gil over the edge. Guess who found the off switch? And I quote,"All I wanted to do was look at lights. Not have some annoying gyrating snowman sing at me the whole time!"
I for some reason felt ill most of the trip. Nauseous to be exact accompanied by back pain reminiscent of a burgeoning kidney stone. I had to stop myself from taking my emergency pain pill. It's a good one that I carry in my purse along with all my analgesics, stomach pills and migraine medicine, but taking it would have made me feel way too Jacqueline Susann and who knows what kind of high jinks I might have gotten into at the next rest stop? Kidney stones ugh.
It was very odd that I found a letter from my urologists reminding me I was due for a follow up when I got home. Only old men and me actually "have" urologists. Such is life. As the trip progressed our mental states severely deteriorated. Or at least mine did. I started plotting and scheming. One of such scheme was to invent dances and make the general public fall for them. I believe I said, "People are sheep. They'll do anything." My suggested dances were the "Herkimer Jerk" and the "Schenectady Scoot". Which I think have quite the ring to them.
However in retrospect as the inventor I might get sued. I mean they involve a great deal of flailing about and if you aren't a trained professional like me you might get hurt. Wade Robeson had better watch out! However, it got really bad when we passed a truck, which had a Chiquita banana cab and a GE trailer. I questioned that and Michael said something about "back hauling." I told him he was crazy and that banana's and electricity don't mix. As in, "What? I can't hear you. I have an arrhgghhh!" You get the picture.
The best surprise was finding my out of print, special ordered from New Zealand mint condition copy of The Candy Skins "Space I'm In" had delivered. I may love love love Fountains of Wayne but I think this is my favorite pop rock album of all time. I am complete woman now that I have it on CD or some close approximation. So now we're home and the Monkeys have been good. Nothing is ruined and we're ready for bed.
Night night.posted by Little Squaw on 10:54 PM
Feeling Maine looking Massachusetts...
Home again, home again jiggedy jig. Your mother's a warthog. Your father's a pig.
Well we made finally made it home after a very very very long drive. Thankfully the weather was clear and we were driving against traffic! Who would have guessed it? We had a very productive day with a side trip Wal-Mart 1 hour into the drive. We bought our first Christmas lights, tree topper and skirt. We're totally going retro hokey. Which in reality is how we feel Christmas decorations should be. I can sum up shopping in Wal-Mart in five words fat people in jogging pants. If one more of them would have bumped into me I might have gotten violent. Plus there as a four-foot tall singing snowman which totally sent Gil over the edge. Guess who found the off switch? And I quote,"All I wanted to do was look at lights. Not have some annoying gyrating snowman sing at me the whole time!"
I for some reason felt ill most of the trip. Nauseous to be exact accompanied by back pain reminiscent of a burgeoning kidney stone. I had to stop myself from taking my emergency pain pill. It's a good one that I carry in my purse along with all my analgesics, stomach pills and migraine medicine, but taking it would have made me feel way too Jacqueline Susann and who knows what kind of high jinks I might have gotten into at the next rest stop? Kidney stones ugh.
It was very odd that I found a letter from my urologists reminding me I was due for a follow up when I got home. Only old men and me actually "have" urologists. Such is life. As the trip progressed our mental states severely deteriorated. Or at least mine did. I started plotting and scheming. One of such scheme was to invent dances and make the general public fall for them. I believe I said, "People are sheep. They'll do anything." My suggested dances were the "Herkimer Jerk" and the "Schenectady Scoot". Which I think have quite the ring to them.
However in retrospect as the inventor I might get sued. I mean they involve a great deal of flailing about and if you aren't a trained professional like me you might get hurt. Wade Robeson had better watch out! However, it got really bad when we passed a truck, which had a Chiquita banana cab and a GE trailer. I questioned that and Michael said something about "back hauling." I told him he was crazy and that banana's and electricity don't mix. As in, "What? I can't hear you. I have an arrhgghhh!" You get the picture.
The best surprise was finding my out of print, special ordered from New Zealand mint condition copy of The Candy Skins "Space I'm In" had delivered. I may love love love Fountains of Wayne but I think this is my favorite pop rock album of all time. I am complete woman now that I have it on CD or some close approximation. So now we're home and the Monkeys have been good. Nothing is ruined and we're ready for bed.
Night night.posted by Little Squaw on 10:54 PM
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